I have so much to say about this, but don’t even know where to start. This shit is on the level of Bangs, but at least with him I was entertained vs wanting to stab my ears an eyes. Let’s start with the title of the song “I Don’t Give A Fuck”. Clearly you don’t, cause you put out your $2 dollar video anyways. I mean really? Shot in some jam space hallway in the OC, with a bunch of your inked up friends (I should note that I saw 3 of my friends in this video haha) to make you look hardcore. Which makes me right there questions so much. Why didn’t my friends who are hardcore tell me about this video instead of me finding this on the net. I guess I can answer my own question there. You added the lyrics at the bottom of the screen. That should have been your first clue that maybe it wasn’t time to do a music video yet, perhaps english classes first? This video/song/production sucks! And to make it worse, you couldn’t just end it with the 4 min video, you chose to add an additional 4 min of the “makin of” footage. It’s shit like this that makes mental. Working in the industry for so many years I had my earful of talentless fucks, but this is just ridiculous. I don’t know why I bother ranting, by the time this posts she will probably be the hottest thing on Psychopathic Records.
Oh please, I don’t go on rants much. Ok who am I kidding I go on them all the time but seriously. Jesse James is an idiot, so I refuse to accept the possibility that the nasty chick Michelle Bombshell gave him the nickname ‘Vanilla Gorilla’ because he has a big dick. More likely is that he still has this Halloween costume that he wore back in 2004, seven months before he and Sandra Bullock got married. So presumably this is where the nickname came from. And it’s why my costume this year will be called “Dongzilla”. It should also be pointed out that Jesse has companies named Vanilla Gorilla LLC, Way Fast Whitey LLC, and Mighty Whitey LLC. And he was banging a white supremacist Nazi. And the West Coast Choppers logo is an Iron Cross, which is a symbol for many things of course, but was also a medal given by the German army up through WWII. Rommel and Goring won it, for example. Oh but I’m sure this is all just coincidence.
Ask any girl thats ever slept with me, Im the real Vanilla Gorilla!!
I wanted to wait a few days to post this just cause it seemed like the right thing to do, plus every blog has already done one. I grew up in the 80s and when I found out the other morning I kinda shrugged it off. Just because we all knew this day was coming doesn’t make the news any easier to swallow: Corey Haim, eighties teen icon and the Canadian half of the Two Coreys, finally lost the 20-plus year war he waged against substance abuse. Haim collapsed in his North Hollywood apartment in the early hours of this morning after suffering what appears to be an accidental, prescription pill overdose; coincidentally enough, he was living in the very same apartment building where Rick James died back in 2004. Sadly, he never regained consciousness and was pronounced dead at 2:15 a.m. this morning. After working as a child actor in Canada, Haim rose to fame Stateside in 1986 when he starred as a bookshy, nerdy teen from the wrong side of the tracks in Lucas. While it initially looked as if Haim could carve out a niche for himself as a lovable geek in the Anthony Michael Hall vein, he promptly did a 180 and turned himself into a veritable teen dream love machine with roles in The Lost Boys and License To Drive. His successes paved the way for cocksure teens like Kirk Cameron (a fellow Canadian!) and Mark-Paul Gosselaar to gain a foothold in pop culture, but sadly, the fame went to his head and he got himself caught up in the excesses of the decade, snorting his way out of the rolodexes of everyone in Hollywood by the year 1990. Haim went on to work fairly consistently throughout the nineties, but substance abuse issues prevented him from getting work in anything other than lowly regarded straight-to-VHS thrillers. After suffering from a drug-induced stroke in the early aughts, he staged a minor comeback in the last few years after reuniting with his partner-in-crime, Corey Feldman, for a reality show that aired for two seasons on A&E. However, during the course of that show, his erratic behavior and constant sweating were two telltale signs that even if he had stopped doing cocaine on the regular, he still had some significant issues with prescription drug abuse. To wit, the show was canceled after Feldman told producers that he would no longer do the show until his old friend Haim got “the help he truly needs.” Sadly, as the news of this morning teaches us, Haim was clearly never able to get that help. Although history will almost certainly remember Haim as a cautionary tale, another in a long line of child actors who epitomized the dangers of growing up too fast in Hollywood, I prefer to remember him this way: sitting in a bubble bath, singing along with his not-quite-broken voice to Clarence “Frogman” Henry’s mournful “Ain’t Got No Home,” preparing to do battle with vampires. Rest in peace, Corey.
So last Monday night saw the series finale of ABC’s The Bachelor, featuring airline pilot and part-time stomach clothes-washer Jake Pavelka choosing between a gaggle of sharp-toothed, man-thirsty ladies, thrown into a house with a trunk full of sateen clearance prom gowns, and told to do whatever it takes to win this man’s love. I think Jake Pavelka was voted the hottest bachelor to date, I don’t know why. He’s a borderline moron who was looking for a woman to both wrastle and impregnate, but point being. A few weeks ago, Jake was down to 4 possible brides: Gia, “Like Gina Gershon, Minus The N-Gershon”; Aly, a blond girl from Rivendell; Tenley, a premature baby who enjoyed dancing; and Vienna, who grew up on freeze-dried alligator meat which she then stuffed into her chest skin to make breasts. Aly eventually left for “work purposes” (really, where does she work, The Drama Barn? Zingggggg, I’m here all week.), and it was announced today that she is going to be America’s next Bachelorette. Jake then denied Gia a rose, surprising til we found out later the bitch already has a boyfriend. Jake was now left with 2 ladies. Elton John’s “Tiny Dancer” and the Vienna Sausage Factory. Each lady was introduced to Jake’s family. The verdict was clear: Tenley was a girl with a 3-chambered heart of gold, while Vienna, the “bad” girl, did not jive with the ladies of her fam. By this point it was pretty clear. The lady that Jake would to fuck for the rest of his life (or at least the next 12 months) is Vienna. And, so, Vienna is the “lady” who he chose.
Some thoughts:
1. Poor Tenley. The girl is as fragile as a woman with glass bones, both physically and emotionally. She was already DUMPED by her first husband, and now this? On national television? It ain’t right. He spends the entire season telling her he loves her and that he’s falling in love with her, and then cries on a mountain in St. Lucia that things just didn’t feel right. YOU DICKLESS HUMAN BEING. I wasn’t Tenley’s biggest fan, but shit, give the girl a break. She’s only 5 months old hahah.
2. Good Luck with Vienna. Place your bets on how long this engagement lasts. Shorter or Longer than the amount of time it takes for a fly to become a Great Grandmother? This is a tough one.
3. Thankfully, Jake Is Coming Back. On Dancing with the Stars! Bachelor Plot Twist: He falls in love with fellow dancer Kate Gosselin. Can you imagine?
4. This Show Is A Sham. So why do I keep watching it?
5. I need a life realllllllll bad.
Side Note* Someone please vote for me as the next Bachelor, Im going to fuck this show up lol.
After loving the woman of my dreams day and night for the last 3 years, I received a text msg from her a week ago saying it all. “I don’t love you anymore”. We have been broken up since October of last year, but that didn’t matter to me. She matters to me. I stayed true. I didn’t stop fighting, I didn’t give up. You don’t give up on true love. I kept communication going, emails, texts, phone calls. I did whatever needed to be done for us both to be back in each others arms, where I truly believe even still we belong. But that doesn’t matter, nothing does. Doesn’t matter how many hoops I jumped through. Doesn’t matter how many changes I made. The constant promises of visits, love and still caring were all just more words. I made the mistake of believing those words, and the lies and promises of forever that came with them. It’s amazing how much pain and suffering the human heart can take. Once again I have been beaten down to a pulp, with no relief in sight. The only thing I have ever wanted was her. The only thing I have ever known to be real was her. My one true love, my everything, my forever. Brooke Nicole Welsch. I went a year the first time, in pain just waiting for her love to return. But now Im here again, and I can’t believe it. I could always close my eyes and see us, married, kids, forever. Now I close my eyes so hard, and pray but when I open them nothing has changed. Same heartbreak, same nightmare. And the worst part is I am suffering alone. Because I am the only one that meant the words and promises, I am the only one that meant forever. Nothing has been said since that text msg, not that I haven’t tried. But really, what is there to say? Those 5 words I never thought I would hear said it all. I can hardly breathe, Im simply beyond broken. My whole world has come to an end. The forever I have always wanted with the perfect woman is gone. The love of my life is gone. My best friend is gone. And just like a fool, I am so fuckin in love with her still. Waiting, hoping she will take away my pain, praying she will save me. Save me from this nightmare I don’t deserve to be in.
There isn’t a simple way to end this post when you have so much to say, but I tried. You went away because you said you didn’t love me anymore. Well I guess you win, I will go away. Because all I know how to do is love you….
Life – As some of you know I am a single dad to a gorgeous 11 year old girl. Raising a girl alone as a single parent has its challenges. Especially at the lovely age we are at now. If you think your gf/wife has mood swings, try walking into an 11 year olds room unexpected. Trust me, I assure you anything your gf/wife dishes out is a picnic compared to what I have seen or dealt with hahah. And omg the fuckin Twilight shit I have to go through. Edward this and Jacob that. Fuck me. Regardless Zoe has been my biggest accomplishment to date. I never have been really good at a lot of things other than being a complete asshole, but being a daddy has always just kinda come naturally to me. I am not the best by far, and I am not the worst. But I have given it my all for 11 years and I am proud to say I am raising a beautiful little lady. With a pre teen birthday, a period, a trip to Disney World in February and high school to look forward to in 2010, Im sure this next year will bring a slew of more challenges for us to tackle, I only hope I can do a good job and make her proud.
Love – If you don’t know by now that I am currently heartbroken, then you really haven’t been following the blog well hahah. It’s true, even the king of douche bags can be beaten down. None the less, I am completely head over heels in love with a woman named Brooke that I am sadly no longer with. To me she is and has always been the most perfect woman and my everything. She’s gorgeous, funny, an amazing cook, popular, crazy style and a good mommy when she needs to be. Even her in-perfections were perfect. See thats the great thing about love, the other persons in-perfections don’t matter, because when your in love they are perfect too. Basically she is the woman you could spend your whole life looking for, in hopes of spending it together as one. And I found her, and fell in love instantly. I will give you the fast movie version. Boy meets girl, boy falls for girl, boy is happy for the first time ever, boy and girl live together, girl destroys boy. Now for most it would end there, but I am not most. Boy waits a year for girl, girl comes back, boy falls for girl again, boy is finally happy again, girl promises forever, girl destroys boy again. An now you are all caught up, and it didn’t even cost you $12,50 + popcorn. I am only telling you all this because, you are all apart of Truth of a Liar, and she is such a huge part of me. Over the last months a few of my posts have mentioned her, or even were aimed towards her. That’s kinda just how the blog cookie crumbles when your in love. This blog is real, I am real, so every once in a while you will see real posts like this, from the heart. I will end with this. She was the best part of 2009 for me. I never thought in a million years, id be going into 2010 without her, actually I never thought I would go anywhere without her. I honestly believed in marrigae, a family and forever and it all began and ended with Brooke. So today, I remain broken, deeply in love and most importantly waiting. Until the day she is in my arms once more, and I am complete.
Work – I wanna close with this. Truth of a Liar has been a project I have wanted to work on since late 2008. I know everyone and their mother has a blog these days. And thats why I wanted to make sure TOAL was different from the norm. Over the last 7 months I have tried to bring you cool original interesting posts, as well as try and hook as many of you up as I could with giveaways. This blog was born in June, and I got the word out on it strictly from my 100 or so friends on Facebook. Word grew, and now my little blog has a loyal readership who I love. I started with just a few hits in June (which btw you should check out old post, there is some good shit) to now having over 1000 + page veiws a day and over 25,000+ unique hits!! Im really blown away. I just wanna say thank you to you all for coming back here daily, and leaving your 2 cents in the posts. You are what keep this going. I wanna thank Vince for helping me with any and all HTML issues, and not making me feel like a complete n00b. I wanna thank all the bloggers & websites that have supported and helped me out. I wanna thank Mishka & Wemoto for dressing me from head to toe over the last year. And lastly I wanna thank all the companies for the amazing hook ups, I feel truly blessed to have received so much stuff. Big things are going to happen in 2010 with this blog. Of course you can expect more great posts and giveaways. I will be releasing limited shirts and accessories, that you will be able to pick up via the shop once its officially opened some time this spring. Also a few collabs with a few big names. And finally my talks this month with MTV have led to a small development deal for the summer to take the blog on the road! So 2010 is shaping up pretty nicely.
Again I wanna thank you all for everything, it really is so appreciated. Im off to Vegas for a few days, have a great night, be safe, and Happy New Year!!
So this picture pretty much sums it all up for me. I fuckin hate Christmas, its just another bullshit Hallmark holiday blown out of proportion. I seriously have had a bad feeling in my gut for more than a week leading up to this day. Zero fuckin joy what so ever. You think the Grinch was bitter? At least that punk bitch sold out in the end and made good for Whoville, well NOT me. I have absolutely nothing to be stoked about. The woman I love more than life itself is far away, and that is seriously the worst feeling of all for me. I am so stupidly in love with her, and to not wake up xmas morning in her arms, UGH! I can’t even bare the thought again. Im not going into details, but 3 times now I have been robbed of this day with her, 3 too many. What’s worse is she doesn’t care anymore from what I can tell, just makes me so bummed out. Sucks when you know the way it is supposed to be, sucks even more when you know others have had what you want and they never deserved it to begin with. But thats the way it always is. Undeserving people always get what they want, or in this case what I want. Funny, all I ever wanted and needed was her, but I guess what I want doesn’t mean shit. Im going to crawl into bed and sleep the next few days away. Fuck Christmas 2009
All good Jedi know that the best way to survive a snow storm is in the snugly belly of your nearest Tauntaun. Just cut open with your handy dandy light saber, a single horizontal slice across the midsection will do, push squirming intestines aside, and crawl right in. Warm as it is comfortable, the intestines mold to your body like a memory foam mattress. But how long could you survive in a Tauntaun? Realistically, the sub-zero environment of Hoth is no place to be, Tauntaun or not. And it’s important to remember that Luke Skywalker didn’t need to survive in his Tauntaun over night, he simply needed a warm place to be until Han had time to build a proper shelter. So, the better question might be, how long did Han have to build a snow shelter until Luke was in serious trouble. In a normal environment, a carcass gets cold in 8 to 36 hours losing an average rate of 1.6 degrees Fahrenheit per hour. However, the ice world of Hoth is not an average environment. The Star Wars database lists that Hoth reaches nightly temperatures of -60 F. In a frigid, sub-zero environment, body heat can be lost almost 32 times faster. This means a Tauntaun’s body heat could drop almost 51.2 F every hour. Considering that Han Solo’s Tauntaun died of severe hypothermia even before it was cut open with Luke’s light saber, one could assume it’s core body temperature was already well below normal. The problem for Luke is if the Tauntaun’s body temperature reaches freezing point those once toasty guts, blood, and assorted alien goo, will in fact become a frozen coffin. If the Tauntaun died of cardiac arrest due to hypothermia with an average body temperature of 75 F (23 C), and if Tauntaun blood freezes at 28.4 F (-2 C), then Han has roughly 56 minutes to set up a shelter before Luke once again is in danger of losing his life in the barren wasteland of Hoth.
Try a Tauntaun yourself, it’s Tontons of Fun hahah.
I spent a few days in Hampton VA for the American Thanksgiving. Sometimes you need to go back to where it all began, to make sense of it all. 3 days later and Im still nothing but confused, lost, and worse off than before. I found about 15 minutes of peace the whole trip, while walking down the beach alone. It was nice to spend a few days with Jerry & crew, but reality bites, and she bites hard. I honestly do not know what I am supposed to do. This is the last thing I wanted. The empty feeling eating away inside. Every thought of the forever I wanted, lost. Promises of love until death. I was stupid to believe. I guess I was just another promise, you couldn’t keep. Or maybe I just wasn’t worthy of keeping.
The rumble you felt emanating out of San Diego’s Comic-Con a few weeks ago was the simultaneous nerdgasm had by throngs of lonely boy-crotches while viewing the trailer for Avatar, the James Cameron opus which had to wait years to be made because the proper CGI technology did not exist back then. (Even though I’m pretttty sure Steven King’s Sleepwalkers came out 20 years ago with nearly identical cat face people.) While a poor quality version of the trailer leaked online a couple of weeks ago, today we’re given an “official” Avatar trailer, with which we can marvel at the pretty mind blowing special effects…then again. The trailer is basically a Jar Jar Binks barf of mish-mashed special effects with a side of Lord of the Rings deleted scenes and more than a pinch of Apocalypto. I’ve watched it three times and still have no idea what the hell this movie is about. Here is what I can deduce:
An earthling in a wheelchair lands on a post-apocalyptic planet that is basically Japan, where he comes across a glorious blue panther-person in a tank. Within seconds, a creep with a veiny forehead turns our wheelchaired hero into one of these blue panther-people. He escapes, on a mission, one assumes to take revenge on his creators (after all, he leaves an angry blue arm print on a window.) Just then, a bunch of fuckin’ dinosaurs show up and fuck shit up for everybody. Wow December 2009 can’t come fast enough…..NOT
Posted on August 16th, 2010 by Chris Is A Liar
Posted in: Rants, WTF?!?!
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